12 Hard Truths – It’s time to bring great perspective to your self and your life.
Truth – A Difficult Pill To Swallow
Sometimes the truth can come in pills that are difficult to swallow. In search of a life that’s easy and pleasing, we often disregard the grittier and harder concepts. Some things we have never taken the chance to learn, perhaps you didn’t have figures in your life who prompted you to seek out hard truths, or maybe you know them but exist in a space of fear or worry and find it simpler to just ignore the harder truths of life altogether.
If any of this sounds like you, know that you’re not alone. Too many people ignore the perspective that the harder lessons of life can offer them, and in return, these people miss out on the most fulfilling aspects of their own journey.
A HARD TRUTH is aptly named because some knowledge is hard. It can be difficult to understand, like how failures can be the greatest opportunity, or difficult to accept, like the shortness of life or the inevitability of change. Unfortunately, running from these truths doesn’t make them any less true, and hiding from them certainly won’t impact your life in any positive or uplifting way. We need to face hard truths head-on, face first, and eyes open. When our mindsets are prepped for growth, we can begin to dissect our experiences and retrieve key factors that strengthen and round us out.
In this book, we’ll look at hard truths deeper than you’ve probably ever attempted to look at them before. It’s important to know the concept behind a hard truth, what it looks like, and why it exists. When you can understand this, you can begin to see how these truths can teach us, both about ourselves, as well as the world and people around us.
Slowly, but surely these truths can shift your perspective so that even when your problems remain consistent, your outlook might change. We’ll finish the book by looking at 12 of the most prominent hard truths that you should look out for. We’ll elaborate on their meaning and discuss how your experience with them can positively impact your life.
Life And Its Truth
Life is a journey full of twists and turns, highs and lows, and moments of joy and pain. Anyone who has truly lived knows that you can’t have one without the rest. So, then, life is a complex experience. Due to this, it can be challenging to navigate it. Of course, in youth, we accept this to be true, but even in adulthood, many find themselves searching for a better understanding of life and the experiences they have.
For all the difficulty, life can also be incredibly rewarding. Along the way, we encounter various truths that shape our perceptions of both the world and ourselves. Some of these truths are pleasant and easier to accept, while others are harsh and difficult to come to terms with. However, it is important to recognize that even life’s hard truths are essential to our growth and development as individuals.
Psychologist Abraham Maslow was known for his work on human motivation and the hierarchy of needs. He believed that humans have an innate desire to fulfill their potential and achieve growth and self-actualization. Maslow’s years of work highlight the importance of understanding life’s truths and using them as a catalyst to develop who we are and how we live.
Our early life can be such a blur to us, so much so that we often appreciate the magnitude of growth that occurs over such a relatively short amount of time. Everything, from the bumps and bruises to the education or guidance we receive both formally and informally, shapes the person we choose to become.
One small experience may deter you from a particular food or city or person. Other moments might eternally draw you into a smell, a sound, or even the way someone smirks or laughs, or behaves. Without even realizing it, we are constantly evolving and adapting to the truth of our lived experiences.
How Life Can Teach Us
How does life teach us? Sure, people teach us and, maybe more often than not, we feel like we teach ourselves. But life itself is a journey of mixed and varied experiences, through which we learn valuable lessons about ourselves as well as others, and even the interconnection between the two. Life can teach us many things, from how to be resilient in the face of adversity to how to appreciate the simple things in life. Studying these experiences and learning from them can help us grow and develop as individuals.
Studies have shown that life experiences can have a profound impact on our personal growth and development. A study conducted in 2015 titled, “The role of adversity and perceived growth in the prediction of depressive and anxiety symptoms after acute coronary syndrome” by Milena Gandy (and colleagues), found that individuals who faced difficult life experiences, such as illness or loss, were more likely to experience personal growth as a result. These experiences helped individuals develop a greater appreciation for life, and they were better able to cope with future challenges.
If you go on a trip overseas and catch some form of the flu or disease, think about the way that impacts your perspective. Depending on how you process your experiences, you might be able to brush this occurrence off, or perhaps it sits forever in your mind as a largely negative risk. You might never leave the country again!
People who experience difficult heartbreaks tend to struggle to trust “love” again. It’s a common movie trope, and rightfully so. The loss of a relationship is akin to the loss of a human life, something passes away, and a person can easily formulate their truths from their experiences.
They may resolve that love is dead, that relationships are doomed, and that if something so good can suddenly vanish then there’s no point in even trying. You can see how powerful our lived experiences can be.
Another study published in 2019, titled “Lifelong exposure to diverse environments enhances the intrinsic excitability of neurons” by Celia Zhang (and colleagues), found that life experiences could also have a positive impact on our cognitive abilities, a fancy way to say the performance of our mind.
The study found that individuals who had a greater variety of life experiences, such as traveling or trying new things, had better cognitive function than those who had a less varied life experience. This suggests that the more we expose ourselves to new experiences, the better we can develop our cognitive abilities.
Since we tend to view the future through our lived past, it also makes sense that life is the greatest teacher of values, such as resilience, empathy, and compassion. Negative experiences in the past, just like the loss of a relationship or a terrible experience, can sour our expectations of the future.
Do you find that your perception of the future is one of hope or more of cynicism? People can preach to you all day, but your experiences and the way you process them will hold the most weight as you walk forward.
Hopefully, you can see how important your experiences are. But what if you’ve lived through nothing but bad experiences? Aside from our own decisions, there’s a whole world out there that’s constantly interjecting into our plans and hopes. We can’t control everything, so what do we do when life is just a bunch of negativity? We hold fast to the truths of life.
What Are Hard Truths
We’ve used the term “hard truths” several times now, but what exactly is a hard truth? While most hard truths are universal, some might be “harder” for you than others. Hard truths are those harsh realities of life, characterized by our tendency to try to avoid or even ignore them. They are the uncomfortable truths that challenge our perceptions of the world and ourselves. Hard truths can be difficult to accept at first, but they are essential to our personal development.
Experts have discussed the importance of acknowledging hard truths for a long time now. Even philosophers throughout recorded time have pondered the tougher concepts that make up our life. Psychologist Jordan Peterson believes that facing the truth is a fundamental part of human existence. He argues that individuals who avoid the truth will inevitably suffer as a result.
Similarly, philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche believed that accepting harsh truths was essential for humankind if they wish to grow and develop beyond themselves. He argued that individuals who faced their fears and embraced the uncomfortable truths of life were more likely to achieve personal success and fulfillment than those who avoided them.
We’ll look at 12 different hard truths in a moment here, but it’s important to understand the vein that they all share. Concepts like a failure, death, change, and victimhood scare us. They tend to touch on things we can’t control and that tends to make a person feel uncomfortable.
Living in ignorance starts to sound easier to many, but whether or not we face these ideas, will not change their effect on our life. We might as well benefit from these areas of life and use them to shape ourselves into stronger and more capable individuals.
Hard Truths And Perspective
By acknowledging and accepting hard truths, we can gain a greater perspective on life and achieve personal growth and development.
Studies have shown that having a broader perspective on life can lead to greater success and happiness. One study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that individuals who had a broader perspective on life were more likely to be successful and happy than those with a narrower perspective. This suggests that by embracing hard truths and gaining a broader perspective on life, we can achieve greater personal success and fulfillment.
Furthermore, hard truths can help us to focus on the things that truly matter in life. By acknowledging the impermanence of life, we can learn to appreciate the present and let go of the things that hold us back. This can help us to achieve greater personal growth and development.
In addition, hard truths can help us to develop greater resilience and adaptability. By acknowledging the challenges and obstacles we face in life, we can develop the strength to overcome them. This can help us to become more adaptable and better able to cope with future challenges.
Moreover, hard truths can help us to develop greater empathy and compassion for others. By acknowledging our own struggles and the struggles of others, we can become more empathetic and understanding. This can help us to build stronger relationships and contribute positively to society.
One hard truth that can lead to greater perspective and personal growth is the impermanence of life. As mentioned earlier, acknowledging the impermanence of life can help us to appreciate the present and let go of the things that hold us back.
A study published in the Journal of Positive Psychology found that individuals who practiced acceptance of the impermanence of life reported greater well-being and life satisfaction. This suggests that by embracing this hard truth, we can achieve greater personal happiness and fulfillment.
Another hard truth that can lead to greater perspective and personal growth is the recognition that success and happiness are not handed to us on a silver platter. We have to work for them.
By acknowledging this hard truth, we can take ownership of our lives and create the life we want to live. A study published in the Journal of Vocational Behavior found that individuals who had a strong sense of control over their lives were more likely to be satisfied with their careers. This suggests that by taking ownership of our lives, we can achieve greater personal success and fulfillment.
12 Hard Truths That Bring Great Perspective
Now that you understand what a hard truth is, and how it can teach and mold our lives, it’s time to dive deeper. We’ll look at 12 of the biggest hard-to-swallow truths that you will have to face in your life. It’s important you understand what makes these truths so hard to accept, and just how important embracing them can be to your growth and success.
#1| “I Can’t” Is Just An Excuse
Many people often use the phrase “I can’t” to avoid facing the responsibility for their choices or to justify their lack of effort. This hard truth is widespread and can be difficult to accept. Rather than admitting “I don’t want to” or “I don’t know how to,” we frequently give up our power by merely saying we can’t do something. The reality, however, is that “I can’t” is just a limiting belief that prevents you from achieving your full potential. Embracing the truth of “I can” opens up a world of possibilities and paves the way for personal growth and success.
So, why is it so challenging for people to accept this truth? Many individuals grapple with limiting beliefs rooted in negative experiences or societal conditioning. Growing up, you might have encountered people imposing limitations on you, be they strangers or even close loved ones.
The media we consume and the culture we live in can also shape our preconceived notions about what we can and cannot do. Overcoming these beliefs can be tough, especially in the beginning, leaving people feeling stuck and unable to reach their full potential. Moreover, fear of failure or rejection can also hinder people from embracing the empowering truth of “I can.”
Psychologist Carol Dweck, renowned for her work on growth mindset, highlights the significance of adopting the belief that “I can.” She posits that individuals with a growth mindset – those who believe they can develop their abilities through hard work and dedication – are more likely to attain personal success and fulfillment. In a study published in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, researchers discovered that individuals who believed they could change their personality traits through effort and practice were more likely to experience personal growth and success than those who considered their traits fixed and unchangeable.
Accepting the truth of “I can” can lead to personal growth and success. It enables individuals to overcome limiting beliefs and take control of their lives. By adopting a growth mindset and believing that they can develop their abilities through hard work and dedication, people can unlock their full potential. For instance, a student who struggles with math may say, “I can’t do the math.” However, by embracing the truth of “I can,” they can overcome their limiting belief and work diligently to improve their math skills.
Embracing the truth of “I can” offers a perspective of empowerment and possibility. It encourages individuals to take charge of their lives and pursue their dreams and aspirations. By acknowledging their own potential, people can conquer limiting beliefs and achieve personal success and fulfillment.
Consider, for example, someone who dreams of running a marathon but feels overwhelmed by the physical demands. By replacing the limiting belief of “I can’t” with the empowering truth of “I can,” they can develop a training plan, dedicate time and effort to build their stamina, and eventually achieve their goal.
Moreover, the power of “I can” transcends personal achievements and can also positively impact our relationships and communities. When we believe in our ability to make a difference, we become more likely to engage in activities that promote positive change, such as volunteering or advocating for important causes.
Accepting that “I can’t” is just an excuse is an empowering perspective that opens up a world of possibilities. By recognizing and embracing the potential within ourselves, we can overcome limiting beliefs, achieve personal growth and success, and make a meaningful difference in the world around us.
So, the next time you catch yourself saying “I can’t,” take a step back and consider how the power of “I can” can change your perspective. Replace that limiting belief with an attitude of determination and resilience.
This simple shift in mindset can not only lead to personal growth and success but also create a ripple effect that inspires others around you to embrace their own potential and make a positive impact on the world. Remember, the journey to greatness begins with the belief that you can achieve anything you set your mind to. Embrace the truth of “I can” and watch your life transform in ways you never thought possible.
#2| It’s Not About What You Can Or Can’t Control, It’s About How You Respond.
Life presents many situations that are beyond our control, such as natural disasters, the actions of others, or sudden changes in our careers or relationships. These events can dramatically affect our goals and aspirations, sometimes turning our lives upside down in a single day.
This uncertainty can be quite frightening. Often, people react to this fear by trying to over control and manage every aspect of their lives, which is ultimately unsuccessful. The truth is you can’t control everything. However, what is within our control is how we respond to these situations. Embracing this truth can help individuals develop resilience, bounce back, and cope with adversity.
Many people find it difficult to accept that they are powerless in the face of challenging situations. It can be hard to come to terms with the fact that certain aspects of life, such as weather patterns, economic downturns, or the loss of a loved one, are beyond our control. This difficulty stems from the fact that most people have expectations about how their lives should unfold. Accepting that we can’t control everything can be a significant challenge.
A study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that individuals who were able to control their responses to uncontrollable situations reported a higher level of perceived control in their lives. Interestingly, while these people might seem less in control, they actually end up feeling more in control than their counterparts.
Psychologist Martin Seligman, known for his work on positive psychology, emphasizes the importance of resilience in coping with adversity. He argues that when you are resilient and able to bounce back from difficult situations, you are more likely to succeed and find fulfillment despite the complications you face.
Accepting that it’s not about what you can or can’t control, but how you respond, can help individuals develop resilience and cope with adversity. For example, someone may face a challenging situation, such as losing their job or dealing with a health problem. In these instances, their level of control over important aspects of their lives has diminished. By embracing the truth that it’s not about what they can or can’t control but how they respond, they can develop resilience and take proactive steps to improve their situation.
Consider a scenario where a loved one becomes seriously ill. Trying to control the outcome will likely lead to stress, heartache, and anxiety. Instead, focusing on your response is crucial. How can you be of assistance? What practical needs can you help with? What mindfulness practices can you employ to take care of yourself during this challenging time? By shifting your focus from stressing over something uncontrollable to developing a strategy and purpose, you can better navigate this difficult period.
Accepting that it’s not about what you can or can’t control but how you respond brings a perspective of empowerment and agency. It encourages individuals to concentrate on what is within their control and take proactive steps to improve their situation. By developing resilience and coping skills, individuals can overcome adversity and achieve personal growth and success.
Embracing this hard truth is an empowering perspective that can significantly benefit you. By acknowledging that we can only control our responses, we can develop resilience, learn to cope with adversity, and ultimately achieve personal growth and success. The next time you face a challenging situation, remember that it’s not about what you can or can’t control but how you choose to respond and watch as your life transforms for the better.
#3| Not Life Or Anyone Will Ever Give You Anything, You Have To Create The Life You Want To Live.
Many people hold the belief that success and happiness are dependent on external factors, such as luck or the actions of others. This misconception leads to a passive attitude, where individuals wait for opportunities to fall into their laps. However, the truth is that you have the power to create the life you want to live. Embracing this truth can help you take ownership of your life and achieve personal success and fulfillment.
Many individuals struggle with feeling powerless or victimized by external factors. They may believe that their success or happiness hinges on the actions of others or circumstances beyond their control. Additionally, societal conditioning often reinforces the idea that success and happiness are handed to individuals, rather than something they must actively work towards.
Psychologist Albert Bandura, known for his work on self-efficacy, emphasizes the importance of taking ownership of one’s life. He argues that individuals who believe they have the power to shape their lives are more likely to achieve personal success and fulfillment. This belief in personal agency and control leads to proactive behavior, where individuals set goals and take steps to achieve them.
By accepting the truth that you have the power to create the life you want to live, you can take ownership of your life and achieve personal success and fulfillment. Recognizing your own power and agency allows you to set goals and take proactive steps to reach them. No longer a passive bystander, you become an active participant in shaping your own destiny.
Accepting the truth that you have the power to create the life you want to live brings a perspective of empowerment and agency. It encourages you to take ownership of your life and pursue your dreams and aspirations. By recognizing your own power, you can overcome limiting beliefs and achieve personal success and fulfillment.
A study published in the Journal of Positive Psychology found that individuals who believed they had control over their lives were more likely to experience positive emotions and life satisfaction than those who felt powerless. This sense of control leads to increased motivation, persistence, and resilience in the face of challenges.
Consider an individual who dreams of starting their own business but feels powerless to do so due to financial constraints or lack of resources. By embracing the truth that they have to create the life they want to live, they can take ownership of their situation and seek out resources or opportunities to start their business, such as taking out a loan or seeking advice from successful entrepreneurs.
Another example involves someone who desires to improve their physical health but feels overwhelmed by their current circumstances. By accepting that they have the power to create the life they want, they can set achievable goals, such as incorporating regular exercise into their routine or making healthier food choices. By taking ownership of their health, they will begin to see positive changes in their well-being.
To start creating the life you want to live, begin by setting specific, achievable goals. Break these goals down into smaller, manageable steps and focus on one task at a time. Surround yourself with supportive individuals who share your aspirations and can offer guidance and encouragement along the way. Acknowledge and celebrate your achievements, no matter how small they may seem. Each milestone you reach brings you closer to the life you want to live. Develop a growth mindset, understanding that setbacks and obstacles are opportunities to learn and grow.
Embracing the truth that you have the power to create the life you want to live is a crucial step toward achieving personal success and fulfillment. By taking ownership of your life and recognizing your power and agency, you can overcome limiting beliefs and actively pursue your dreams and aspirations. It’s important to remember that success and happiness are not handed to you; they are the result of your own efforts and determination.
#4| Everything Can Change In An Instant.
Do you know how they say that life is unpredictable? Well, that’s an understatement. The hard truth is that everything can change in an instant. One moment you’re cruising along, enjoying the ride, and the next, everything you thought you knew is turned upside down.
Think about it: have you ever experienced a sudden, unexpected change in your life? Maybe you got laid off from your job, or your relationship ended abruptly. Maybe you received a diagnosis that turned your world upside down. Whatever the case may be, sudden change can be jarring, even terrifying.
But the thing is, change is inevitable. We can’t control everything that happens to us, but we can control how we respond to it. In fact, some of the most incredible stories of human resilience come from those who have faced unimaginable hardship and come out stronger on the other side.
Take the story of Malala Yousafzai, for example. Malala was just 15 years old when she was shot in the head by the Taliban for advocating for girls’ education in Pakistan. The attack left her in critical condition, and doctors didn’t know if she would survive. But survive she did, and not only that, but she also continued to fight for her cause with even greater determination. Today, Malala is a Nobel Peace Prize laureate and an international icon for education and women’s rights.
Or how about the story of Nick Vujicic? Nick was born without arms or legs, and he spent much of his childhood feeling isolated and alone. But instead of giving up, he learned to adapt, using his mouth to do everything from writing to brushing his teeth. Today, Nick is a motivational speaker, author, and founder of a nonprofit organization that helps people with disabilities.
These stories may seem extraordinary, but the truth is, we all have the capacity for resilience. When faced with sudden change, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed and helpless. But here’s the thing: you’re stronger than you think. You have within you the ability to adapt, grow, and to thrive, even in the face of adversity.
Of course, that’s easier said than done. Coping with sudden change can be a messy, painful process. It’s okay to feel scared, angry, or sad. It’s okay to grieve for what you’ve lost. But eventually, you have to start taking steps forward, even if they’re small ones.
Maybe that means reaching out for help, whether it’s from a friend, a therapist, or a support group. Maybe it means taking up a new hobby or finding ways to be creative. Maybe it means focusing on the things you can control, like your own thoughts and actions.
The important thing is not to give up. Change may be inevitable, but it doesn’t have to defeat you. You are capable of so much more than you realize. So, take a deep breath, and take that first step forward. You might just surprise yourself with what you’re capable of.
In fact, sometimes sudden change can be a catalyst for growth and transformation. When everything you thought you knew is stripped away, you’re forced to reevaluate what really matters to you. You may discover strengths and abilities you didn’t even know you had. You may find yourself pursuing dreams you never thought possible.
Take the story of J.K. Rowling, for example. Before she became a bestselling author, Rowling was a struggling single mom living on government assistance. But when her marriage fell apart and she hit rock bottom, she found solace in writing. The result was the Harry Potter series, which has sold over 500 million copies worldwide and spawned a multi-billion dollar franchise.
Or how about the story of Steve Jobs? Jobs was fired from his own company, Apple, in the mid-1980s, and it seemed like his career was over. But instead of giving up, he founded a new company, NeXT, and later returned to Apple to lead the company to unprecedented success.
These stories show us that sudden change can be a springboard to new opportunities and growth. It’s not always easy, and it may require us to step outside of our comfort zones, but the potential rewards are limitless. So, the next time you’re faced with sudden change, remember that you are not alone. You have the strength and resilience within you to navigate even the toughest of times. And who knows? You may just come out on the other side stronger, wiser, and more fulfilled than ever before.
#5| The Only Opinion About And Validation About Yourself That Matters Is Yours.
It’s easy to get caught up in what other people think about us. We worry about whether we’re liked, whether we’re doing the right thing, and whether we’re measuring up to some invisible standard. But the truth is, none of that matters if you don’t believe in yourself.
Think about it. Have you ever done something you were really proud of, only to have someone else criticize it or belittle your accomplishment? It’s a terrible feeling, right? But here’s the thing: their opinion doesn’t actually change the fact that you did something amazing.
On the other hand, have you ever done something you weren’t proud of, only to have someone else tell you it wasn’t a big deal? That can be equally frustrating. It’s almost like you want them to be angry or disappointed, to validate your own negative self-talk.
The truth is, we can’t control what other people think or feel. We can’t make them like us, approve of us, or validate us. And trying to do so is a surefire path to disappointment and frustration.
The only opinion and validation about yourself that truly matters is your own. You are the only one who knows your thoughts, feelings, and experiences intimately. You are the only one who knows what you’re capable of, what you’ve overcome, and what you’re working toward.
Of course, it’s not always easy to believe in ourselves. We all have moments of self-doubt, insecurity, and fear. But the key is to recognize those moments and challenge them. Ask yourself: “Is this thought really true? Is it helpful? Is it in line with who I want to be?”
For example, maybe you’re struggling with imposter syndrome at work. You feel like you’re not qualified for your job and that your colleagues will find out you’re a fraud. Instead of dwelling on those negative thoughts, try reframing them. Focus on your accomplishments, your strengths, and your unique perspective. Remember that you were hired for a reason and that you’re constantly growing and learning.
Or maybe you’re dealing with body image issues. You feel like you’re not thin enough, fit enough, or attractive enough. Instead of comparing yourself to others or seeking validation from external sources, try focusing on what your body can do. Maybe you can run a mile without stopping, or you can lift heavier weights than you used to. Maybe you have a beautiful smile or kind eyes. Remember that your worth is not determined by your appearance.
The point is you have the power to change your own narrative. You have the power to choose how you view yourself and your accomplishments. And when you start to believe in yourself, amazing things can happen.
Take the story of Misty Copeland, for example. Misty grew up in poverty and started ballet late, at the age of 13. She faced countless obstacles and prejudices in the ballet world, including being told she didn’t have the right body type for ballet. But she refused to let those opinions define her. She continued to work hard, believe in herself, and push past her limits. Today, Misty is the first Black principal dancer at the American Ballet Theatre and a beacon of inspiration for dancers everywhere.
Or how about the story of J.K. Rowling? Rowling faced numerous rejections before her manuscript for Harry Potter was finally accepted. But she never gave up on her vision, even when others didn’t believe in it. Today, she’s one of the bestselling authors of all time and a beloved cultural icon.
These stories show us that when we believe in ourselves, we can achieve incredible things. But it’s not just about achieving external success. When we believe in ourselves, we’re happier, more fulfilled, and more confident in our skin. We’re able to pursue our passions, take risks, and grow as individuals.
So, if you’re struggling with self-doubt or seeking validation from others, remember this hard truth: the only opinion and validation about yourself that matters is yours. Believe in yourself, challenge your negative thoughts, and focus on your strengths and accomplishments. You are capable of amazing things, and the world needs your unique perspective and talents.
#6| Life Is Very Short And You Only Get One.
Let’s talk about something that’s both beautiful and terrifying: the fact that life is very short, and you only get one. It’s easy to get caught up in the day-to-day grind, focus on mundane tasks, and forget about the big picture. But the truth is, our time on this earth is limited. None of us knows how long we have, and none of us can go back and relive the moments that have passed.
This hard truth can be both sobering and inspiring. On one hand, it’s a reminder to make the most of every moment, cherish the people we love, and pursue our passions with abandon. On the other hand, it can also be a source of anxiety and pressure, as we try to cram as much as possible into our limited time.
But here’s the thing: you don’t have to live your life in constant fear or stress. You don’t have to accomplish everything on your bucket list by the time you’re 30. What matters most is that you’re living a life that feels meaningful and fulfilling to you.
Think about the things that truly matter to you. Maybe it’s spending time with loved ones, pursuing a career you’re passionate about, or making a difference in your community. Whatever it is, make that a priority. Don’t wait for some elusive “someday” to start living the life you want.
Of course, that’s easier said than done. We all have obligations and responsibilities that can make it difficult to pursue our dreams. But that doesn’t mean we can’t make small changes to prioritize what matters most.
For example, maybe you’re unhappy in your job and you’ve always dreamed of starting your own business. Instead of waiting until you have enough money or time, start small. Maybe that means taking an online course in entrepreneurship or spending a few hours each week working on a business plan. By taking small, actionable steps, you can start to move closer to your goals.
Or maybe you’ve been meaning to reconnect with an old friend, but you keep putting it off. Instead of waiting for the perfect time, reach out now. Send a text or an email and make plans to catch up. You never know how much that connection could mean to both of you.
The point is, life is short, but that doesn’t mean it has to be overwhelming or stressful. By focusing on what truly matters to you, you can create a life that feels purposeful and fulfilling. Take the story of Randy Pausch, for example. Randy was a computer science professor at Carnegie Mellon University who was diagnosed with terminal pancreatic cancer in 2006. Instead of wallowing in self-pity, Randy decided to give a “last lecture” to his students, in which he shared his life lessons and advice for living a fulfilling life. The lecture became a viral sensation and eventually turned into a bestselling book, “The Last Lecture.”
Or how about the story of Steve Jobs? Jobs famously said in a commencement speech at Stanford University, “Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life.” Jobs knew firsthand how short life could be, having been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer himself. But instead of letting that diagnosis define him, he used it as a catalyst to pursue his passions and make a difference in the world.
These stories show us that we don’t have to wait for a life-altering event to start living the life we want. We can choose to make the most of every moment, prioritize what matters most, and to live with purpose and intention. So, the next time you’re feeling overwhelmed or stuck, remember this hard truth: life is very short, and you only get one.
#7| More Often Than Not You Are Holding Onto Things That Hold You Back.
Let’s talk about a hard truth that can be difficult to accept, more often than not, you are holding onto things that hold you back.
It’s natural to hold onto things, whether it’s a relationship that’s no longer healthy, a job that’s draining your energy, or a negative mindset that keeps you stuck in the same patterns. But the truth is, holding onto these things prevents you from reaching your full potential and can keep you from pursuing your dreams and passions.
It’s important to take a step back and evaluate the things in your life that are holding you back. Are they helping you move closer to your goals and dreams, or are they keeping you stuck in the same place? If it’s the latter, it’s time to let go.
Letting go is not always easy, and it can be scary to step into the unknown. But when you let go of what’s holding you back, you create space for new opportunities and growth.
Take the story of Sylvester Stallone, for example. Stallone grew up in poverty and struggled with dyslexia, which made school difficult for him. Despite these obstacles, Stallone pursued his passion for acting and writing. But even after writing the script for “Rocky,” he faced rejection after rejection from studios who wanted to cast someone else. Instead of giving up, Stallone refused to compromise on his vision and eventually landed a deal that allowed him to star in and direct “Rocky.” The film went on to become a box office smash and won three Academy Awards, including Best Picture.
Or consider the story of Sara Blakely, founder of Spanx. Blakely was working a sales job when she came up with the idea for Spanx, a revolutionary product that transformed the women’s undergarment industry. But even after she had a prototype and a patent, Blakely faced rejection after rejection from male-dominated companies who didn’t understand her vision. Instead of giving up, Blakely took matters into her own hands and started selling Spanx out of her apartment. Today, Spanx is a billion-dollar company and Blakely is a trailblazer in the business world.
These stories show us that letting go of what’s holding us back can lead to incredible success and fulfillment. It may require us to step outside of our comfort zones, take risks, and challenge ourselves. But the potential rewards are limitless.
If you’re holding on to something that’s holding you back, it’s time to start letting go. Maybe that means ending a toxic relationship, quitting a job that’s draining your energy, or challenging a mindset that’s keeping you stuck. Whatever it is, remember that you have the power to create the life you want.
Start small and take one step at a time. Celebrate each small victory along the way and keep moving forward. The more you let go of what’s holding you back, the more you’ll open yourself up to new opportunities and growth.
In the end, the hard truth is that holding on to what’s holding us back only keeps us from reaching our full potential. It’s time to let go and create space for new opportunities and growth. You deserve to live a life that’s aligned with your passions and values, and the first step is to let go of what’s no longer serving you.
#8| More Will Be Revealed.
You don’t have to have all the answers right away.Life is unpredictable, and it’s impossible to know exactly what the future holds. We may have a general sense of where we want to go or what we want to do, but the path to get there is often unclear. In those moments of uncertainty, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed, anxious, or even defeated. We may think that we need to have all the answers before we can move forward. But the truth is, we don’t.
In fact, sometimes the most beautiful and unexpected things happen when we least expect them. We may encounter people or opportunities that we never even knew existed, and those chance encounters can lead us down paths we never thought possible.
Think about a time in your life when something unexpected happened that ended up being a blessing in disguise. Maybe you didn’t get the job you wanted but then stumbled upon a career path that was even more fulfilling. Maybe a relationship ended, but then you met someone who was a better match for you. Or maybe you experienced a setback, but then found the courage to pursue a dream you never thought possible.
These moments of uncertainty can be hard, but they can also be opportunities for growth and discovery. When we let go of the need for control and allow ourselves to be open to new experiences, we can find ourselves on paths we never imagined.
Take the story of Vera Wang, for example. Wang started her career as a figure skater, but after failing to make the Olympic team, she shifted her focus to fashion. She landed a job as an editor at Vogue and eventually became a fashion designer, creating wedding gowns for celebrities and royalty. If Wang had stuck with figure skating, she may have never discovered her passion for fashion and design.
Or consider the story of Jack Ma, the founder of Alibaba. Ma was rejected from every job he applied to after graduating college, including a job at KFC. He eventually started his own company, Alibaba, which is now one of the largest e-commerce companies in the world.
These stories show us that sometimes the most incredible things in life come when we least expect them. It’s okay to take things one step at a time, to focus on the things that matter most to you, and to trust that more will be revealed in due time.
So, if you’re feeling lost or uncertain, remember this hard truth: more will be revealed, and you don’t have to have all the answers right away. Embrace the unknown, take chances, and trust that the universe has a plan for you. Take the time to explore your passions, connect with the people around you, and be open to new experiences. You never know where they might lead.
In the end, the hard truth is that we don’t need to have all the answers right away. Life is unpredictable, and that’s okay. Embrace the unknown, trust in yourself, and be open to new opportunities. More will be revealed in due time, and you just might be surprised at where it takes you.
#9| If You Act And Think Like A Victim, You Will Always Be One.
Being a victim can feel like a comfortable place to be. It’s a way to absolve ourselves of responsibility and blame others for our problems. But the truth is, when we play the victim, we give away our power and control over our lives.
When we act and think like a victim, we tend to focus on the negative aspects of our lives. We dwell on what’s wrong and what’s lacking, rather than on what we can do to change our circumstances. This negative mindset can prevent us from taking action and making positive changes in our lives.
Take the example of two people who both lose their jobs. Person A thinks, “I can’t believe this happened to me. I always get the short end of the stick. I’ll never find a job as good as the one I had.” Person B thinks, “This is a setback, but it’s also an opportunity to find a job that’s a better fit for me. I’m going to take some time to reflect on what I really want to do and then start taking steps to make it happen.”
Person A is stuck in victim mode, while Person B is taking charge of their lives and creating their future. Which person do you think is more likely to find a job they love and feel fulfilled in?
When we act and think like a victim, we also tend to attract negative energy and experiences into our lives. We become so focused on what’s wrong that we don’t see the opportunities that are right in front of us.
On the other hand, when we take ownership of our lives and our choices, we can create a more positive and fulfilling future for ourselves. We may still face challenges and setbacks, but we approach them with a positive mindset and a determination to succeed.
Take the story of Oprah Winfrey, for example. Oprah grew up in poverty and faced numerous challenges throughout her life, including sexual abuse and discrimination. But instead of letting those experiences define her, Oprah used them as motivation to create a better life for herself and others. She became one of the most successful media moguls of all time and a philanthropist who has helped countless people around the world.
Or consider the story of Nick Vujicic, who was born without arms or legs. Despite facing numerous challenges and discrimination, Nick refused to play the victim. He became a motivational speaker and author, inspiring millions of people around the world with his message of hope and resilience.
These stories show us that we have the power to create our own future, no matter what challenges we may face. When we take ownership of our lives and our choices, we can turn setbacks into opportunities and create a more positive and fulfilling future for ourselves.
So, if you find yourself thinking and acting like a victim, remember this hard truth: if you act and think like a victim, you will always be one. Take ownership of your life and your choices, focus on the positive, and be open to new opportunities. You have the power to create the life you want, and it starts with your mindset.
#10| Life Is Full Of Valuable Lessons, If You Are Not Paying Attention, You Will Never Learn.
Hey there, my friend. Let’s talk about a hard truth that we often forget that life is full of valuable lessons, and if you’re not paying attention, you’ll never learn.
We all have busy lives, and it’s easy to get caught up in our routines and habits. But if we’re not careful, we can miss out on the lessons that life is trying to teach us.
Think about a time when you faced a difficult situation. Maybe you had a conflict with a friend or colleague, or maybe you experienced a setback at work or in your personal life. In those moments, it’s easy to feel frustrated, angry, or defeated. But if you take a step back and reflect on the situation, you may find that there are valuable lessons to be learned.
For example, let’s say you disagreed with a friend. Instead of simply blaming the other person or brushing it off, take the time to reflect on what happened. What triggered the disagreement? Were there misunderstandings or miscommunications? What can you do differently next time to avoid a similar situation?
These types of reflections can help you learn valuable lessons about communication, empathy, and conflict resolution. By paying attention to these lessons, you can grow as a person and improve your relationships with others.
The truth is life is full of valuable lessons if we’re willing to pay attention. Every experience we have, whether it’s positive or negative, can teach us something if we’re open to learning.
Consider the story of Elon Musk. Musk has faced numerous setbacks and failures throughout his career, including the bankruptcy of his first company, PayPal. But instead of giving up, Musk used these experiences as opportunities to learn and grow. He went on to found SpaceX, Tesla, and other successful companies that are changing the world.
Or think about the story of Malala Yousafzai. Malala was shot by the Taliban for speaking out about girls’ education, but she refused to be silenced. She used her experience as a platform to advocate for education and women’s rights, eventually becoming the youngest Nobel Peace Prize laureate.
These stories show us that even in the face of adversity, there are valuable lessons to be learned. We can use our experiences to grow and become better versions of ourselves.
So, if you want to learn the valuable lessons that life has to offer, you need to pay attention. Be present at the moment, reflect on your experiences, and be open to new perspectives and ideas.
Here are some tips to help you pay attention and learn from your experiences:
- Practice mindfulness: Mindfulness is the practice of being present at the moment and paying attention to your thoughts and feelings. By practicing mindfulness, you can become more aware of the lessons that life is trying to teach you.
- Keep a journal: Writing down your thoughts and experiences can help you reflect on them more deeply. It can also help you identify patterns and themes in your life that may be holding you back.
- Seek out new experiences: Trying new things can help you learn valuable lessons and gain new perspectives. It can also help you develop new skills and talents that you never knew you had.
- Ask for feedback: Sometimes, we need an outside perspective to see the lessons that life is trying to teach us. Ask friends, family, or colleagues for feedback on your behavior and actions.
- Embrace failure: Failure is a natural part of life, and it can teach us valuable lessons if we’re willing to learn from it. Instead of seeing failure as a negative, embrace it as an opportunity to grow and improve.
In the end, the hard truth is that life is full of valuable lessons, and if you’re not paying attention, you’ll never learn. By being present at the moment, reflecting on your experiences, and being open to new perspectives, you can learn and grow as a person.
Remember, every experience you have is an opportunity to learn something new, whether it’s a positive or negative one. The key is to pay attention, be open to learning, and embrace the lessons that life has to offer.
#11| Life’s Greatest Obstacles And Challenges Will Teach You The Most Valuable Lessons.
It’s easy to get caught up in the good times and forget that the tough times are often where we grow the most. When we face obstacles and challenges, we are forced to step outside our comfort zones and confront our fears and weaknesses.
In those moments of struggle, it can be hard to see the value in the experience. We may feel overwhelmed, defeated, or even hopeless. But if we’re willing to push through the pain and discomfort, we can emerge stronger, wiser, and more resilient than ever before.
Consider the story of Nelson Mandela. Mandela spent 27 years in prison for fighting against apartheid in South Africa. During that time, he faced numerous obstacles and challenges, including physical and emotional abuse, isolation, and separation from his family.
But he refused to give up, using his time in prison to educate himself and plan for a future without apartheid. Mandela eventually became the first black president of South Africa, leading the country through a peaceful transition to democracy.
Mandela’s story shows us that life’s greatest obstacles and challenges can teach us invaluable lessons, such as perseverance, resilience, and courage. When we face adversity, we have the opportunity to tap into our inner strength and discover what we’re truly capable of.
So, if you’re currently facing a difficult situation, remember that there is a valuable lesson to be learned. Here are some tips to help you navigate life’s challenges and emerge stronger on the other side:
- Embrace the struggle: When we face challenges, it can be tempting to try to avoid or ignore them. But the truth is, the struggle is where the growth happens. Embrace the challenge and use it as an opportunity to learn and grow.
- Ask for help: It’s okay to ask for help when you’re facing a difficult situation. Seek out the support of friends, family, or a therapist to help you navigate the challenge and come out stronger on the other side.
- Focus on what you can control: When we face obstacles and challenges, it can be easy to feel powerless. But there are always things we can control, such as our attitude, our actions, and our response to the situation. Focus on what you can control and let go of what you can’t.
- Learn from the experience: Every challenge we face is an opportunity to learn something new. Take the time to reflect on the experience and identify what you’ve learned. Use that knowledge to grow and become stronger in the future.
- Celebrate your victories: When you overcome a challenge, take the time to celebrate your victory. Recognize the strength and resilience you demonstrated and use that as motivation for future challenges.
In the end, the hard truth is that life’s greatest obstacles and challenges will teach you the most valuable lessons. When we face adversity, we have the opportunity to tap into our inner strength and discover what we’re truly capable of. So, if you’re currently facing a difficult situation, remember that there is a lesson to be learned.
Embrace the struggle, ask for help, focus on what you can control, learn from the experience, and celebrate your victories. You have the strength and resilience to overcome any obstacle that comes your way.
#12| You Can Choose To Walk Away From Anything That Is Not Good For You.
Life can be tough, and sometimes it can feel like you are stuck in a situation that is not good for you. It could be a toxic relationship, a dead-end job, or a negative environment that drains your energy and happiness. In these situations, it’s easy to feel trapped, like there’s no way out. But the hard truth is, you can choose to walk away from anything that is not good for you.
Walking away is not an easy decision, and it takes courage and strength. It means letting go of something that was once a part of your life, even if it’s not serving you anymore. It means facing uncertainty and the unknown, but it also means opening yourself up to new opportunities and possibilities.
For example, let’s look at someone named Sarah. Sarah had been in a toxic relationship for years. She loved her partner, but the relationship was not healthy. Her partner was controlling and manipulative, and it was taking a toll on Sarah’s mental health. She felt trapped and didn’t know what to do. But one day, she made the decision to walk away.
It wasn’t an easy decision, and it wasn’t a clean break. Sarah’s partner begged her to come back, promising to change. But Sarah knew that things would never truly change, and she stuck to her decision. It was hard at first, but with time, she began to heal and move on. Now, she is in a much healthier and happier place in her life, and she knows that walking away was the best decision she ever made.
For another example, let’s look at Jack. Jack had been working in a job that he hated for years. It was a high-paying job, but it was also extremely stressful, and it left him feeling drained and unhappy. He had been talking about quitting for years, but he always found a reason to stay. He was afraid of losing the security that his job provided.
But one day, he realized that he couldn’t go on like this. He knew that his job was not good for him, and he had to make a change. He quit his job and started his own business. It wasn’t easy, and there were times when he struggled, but he knew that it was the right decision. Now, he is much happier and fulfilled in his work, and he knows that walking away was the best thing he ever did.
Walking away doesn’t always mean quitting your job or ending a relationship. It could also mean walking away from a negative environment or a toxic friendship. Sometimes, the people we surround ourselves with can bring us down, and it’s important to recognize when a relationship is not healthy.
The hard truth is that sometimes, we have to make tough decisions in life. We have to choose ourselves and our well-being over the comfort of familiarity. But the good news is that we always have a choice. We can choose to walk away from anything that is not good for us, and we can choose to create a better life for ourselves.
Walking away is not easy, and it’s not always the right decision for everyone. It’s a personal decision that requires reflection, honesty, and courage. It’s important to remember that walking away doesn’t mean you’re giving up or failing. It means you’re taking control of your life and making choices that are in your best interest.
The hard truth is that you can choose to walk away from anything that is not good for you. It could be a toxic relationship, a dead-end job, a negative environment, or a toxic friendship. Walking away takes courage and strength, but it also opens up new opportunities and possibilities. It’s a personal decision that requires reflection, honesty, and courage, but it can lead to a happier and more fulfilling life. Remember, you always have a choice, and you can choose to create a better life for yourself.
Final Thoughts
Some truth hurts. Gloria Steinem once said, “The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off.” No doubt, you have had difficult experiences or confrontations around the truths laid out in this book. Likely, there are at least a few that you’ve tried to avoid, and don’t worry, you wouldn’t be alone.
Hard truths are hard to swallow. As you can see through the examples laid out in this book, there are many ways to avoid or disregard these concepts. Maybe up until now, you hadn’t even thought of these, as many people are raised without a great understanding of these truths from the start. No matter your experience with these hard truths in the past, hopefully now you have a much better idea of the role that they are playing in your life.
It’s difficult to accept the shortness of life, or that we might be our greatest obstacle, or perhaps we are terrified of accepting that we “can” do something or that everything may change by this time tomorrow. Truth can be terrifying, but it can also be incredibly empowering. The examples and studies laid out show, again and again, the benefit that is waiting for us when we can fully embrace these truths.
Remember, you’re not alone. This world is filled to the brim with individuals just like you, trying their best with what they have. Give yourself the grace you need to make it through the challenges. Learn and grow. Challenge those around you and invite them to challenge you in return.
Be open to learning and growing, so that you might evolve. In doing so, you will move step after step toward the aspirations and goals that you hold dear. Be your greatest champion. Embrace the hard truths of life, and instead of being overcome by challenges, overcome them, so that you might live your life, and live it to the fullest!
