How To Live A Life That’s Yours Truly


Ernest Hemingway’s famous words capture how many of us feel in today’s world…

 “Don’t you ever get the feeling that all your life is going by and you’re not taking advantage of it? Do you realize you’ve lived nearly half the time you have to live already?” 

If this describes how you are feeling today, then it is time you start living a life that is truly yours.

Making changes to your life to achieve your dreams is not just a matter of learning new things but also of un-learning old ways. To move beyond a mere participant in your life to experience real self-awareness and active consciousness, you have to be willing to take risks, make changes, and let go of old habits of mind.

If you are ready to let go of the confines, restrictions, and limitations you and others have placed upon your life and start living the life you have always wanted, then it is time you learned how to change those limitations and set the course that works for you. 

If you have determined that you are ready to realize your dreams, then you are ready to learn the secrets of self-awareness, understand how you are contributing to your own confinement, and learn the tricks to achieving everything you want.

Understanding Self-Imposed Limitation

In any given day, you probably hear yourself or others say things like, “I’ll never be able to….” or “I can’t believe I am still figuring this out at my age.” Thoughts like these are representative of self-imposed limitations, and the difficult thing about these thoughts is we do not even know we are setting them, and they are very hard to move beyond.

In our lives, we develop a set of understandings and assumptions about life, and these thoughts transform into a reality we firmly believe is real. For example, we all have assumptions about age and how it will affect us going forward. Depending on your background knowledge, experience with older people, family history, and level of health, you probably have many assumptions about what you should be physically capable of doing at age 40, 50, 60, and beyond.

These assumptions, though, are just thoughts. They are not real. There is no rule that says you cannot do something past a certain age; it is only we who place that limit upon ourselves or others. We make it so through our beliefs. This is an example of a self-imposed limitation, but many of us are not even aware that we have imposed these limitations on our notions of aging. We just accept that this is what will happen and there is nothing we can do about it.

Once you become aware that this and thoughts like this are limiting forces in your life, and that you have the power to let go of those limitations and move beyond these barriers, you can reach a new level of self-awareness that involves achieving the dreams you have in life.

Levels of Consciousness

When you are observing and taking in the world through your senses, you are at the early stages of consciousness. When you move beyond this and begin questioning your assumptions, ideas, and expectations, you are developing self-awareness. This exploration of your perceptions and connecting to yourself and others leads to critical examination of everything you have learned in life, what the world has presented to you as fact, and a deeper connection with your own emotions and thoughts.

Once you achieve self-awareness, it begins to become clear what is and is not within your realm of control in life. And here is where the notion of limitations becomes even more apparent. Self-awareness brings with it the ability to examine your emotions, be more honest with yourself about your doubts and fears, and grapple with the limitations you have placed upon yourself and your choices in life.

Self-awareness allows you to see more clearly what is and is not within your realm of control, and this understanding forces you to question the malleability of your assumptions and understandings of the world and others. At this point, you may start to feel as though the whole world looks completely different, and the possibilities in life begin to open up to you.

Self-awareness allows you to become the true navigator of your life. You are free to make decisions about what is best for you without the limits of self-imposed boundaries or societal limitations that are not real. You are not bound by gender roles, generational norms, societal expectations, family approval, or anything else but your own wishes and commitment to success. Self-awareness allows you to become your authentic self and enjoy life in the present moment.

The Power of No Limits

Once you push past your acceptance of the limits you and others place upon you, you can start enjoying your life and crafting into what you want. The present becomes much more meaningful and important, as you are no longer waiting for the right time or for circumstances to change. 

Your every moment is a gift, an opportunity to help you be who you want to be and achieve everything you have longed to attain. The world becomes a limitless mass of possibilities, experiences, passions, and adventures that can fuel your dreams and allow you to blossom into the person you have always dreamed of becoming.

Presence and awareness are key to this realization and movement past self-awareness into self-actualization. When you learn to live in the present, to accept the fullness that life has to offer you here and now, what you really desire in life becomes much more clearly revealed. You can connect to yourself on a new level, understanding yourself without the limitations and barriers imposed by yourself and others, and getting to know the authentic version of yourself that has been freed.

Letting go of those self-imposed limitations, then, is a key to helping you reexamine your life and priorities, shedding the restraints that have been limiting your mind and your dreams, and realizing the dreams that will help you live the life that is yours.

10 New Thought Patterns To Reach Your Full Potential

The most successful people in life are those who succeed despite the obstacles, kept going in the face of adversity, and did not let anyone impose limits on what they knew they could accomplish. So, what kind of mindset is going to help you best achieve your goals and persevere in the face of adversity? How do you switch your mind from one of limitations to one of possibilities?

To become the person you want to be, to live the life that is yours, it is sometimes necessary to let go of old ways of thinking, which can make way for new possibilities. So, here are ten thought patterns to change in order to make way for the new, limitless life you have ahead.

1| Stop Making Excuses

Excuses are just another restriction you have set on your life. We are all dealt a hand in life, but it is how you play it that really matters. Only you are responsible for your life, and we each can expect to get out of it exactly what we put into it. When you realize that only you are responsible for whatever happens next can be scary, but it is also incredibly freeing! To achieve your dreams, stop with the excuses, accept your responsibility in whatever comes next, and charge forward.

2| Stop Caring What Others Think About You

The need to be liked or for others to approve is confining your decisions, and the only one that is unhappy is likely you. You do not have to be everyone’s cup of tea. They may not like tea. In fact, they may be allergic to tea. So, who cares? The only people that matter are the ones who like you for you. You will never make everyone happy, and a life spent trying to accomplish this defeatist goal is a life wasted. Do you like everyone you meet? So, why should everyone who meets you like you? The answer is, they should not, so stop trying.

Release this limitation and remain true to who you want to be. Improve, grow, and learn every day, and when people do not seem to get what you are about, just remember that it is just because they probably drink coffee.

3| Stop Making Unhealthy Choices

You only have one body in this world, and if you do not take care of it, it will not be able to take care of you. The limitations you place upon your future depend highly on how well you take care of yourself today. Eat healthy foods, stay active, get enough rest. Stop sacrificing your health and well-being for the pursuit of something else. Your health should be THE pursuit.

4| Stop Trying to Control Everything

An essential part of self-awareness is understanding those things over which you have some control and those over which you do not. Focus on the things that are within your capacity to change, and let the rest take care of itself. You will find you have less anxiety when you relinquish control and stop wasting time. Releasing control frees up mental space and positive emotions for what really matters, which is achieving your dreams.

5| Stop Thinking Only of “Right Now”

Without long-term goals, life does not have much meaning. If your sole purpose is just to get through today, then what is the point of any of it? Long-term goals do require short-term habits, and these are things you do every day that move you toward the bigger end. By just focusing on the short-term, though, we lose motivation and can start to feel aimless. While gratification today can feel good, imagine how much better it will feel when you finally reach the finish line?

6| Stop Trying to be Perfect

Expecting perfection, from yourself or others, is a strong and confining limitation many of us have in your lives. We are fearful of what others’ may think if we are less than perfect in our work or our relationships, but what we fail to recognize is nothing in life is every perfect. 

Everything can be better, and every time we put something out there into the world that is less than perfect is an opportunity for us to learn and grow. Stop expectation perfection and start striving for continued improvement. You will take advantage of more opportunities with this mindset in life. 

7| Stop Waiting to Win the Lottery

There is no such thing as an easy ride, a magic bullet, or an instant success. Dreams are achieved through tiny steps forward every day, continual improvement toward the finish line. When you sit around waiting for your big break or for fortune to turn its eye on you, you miss so many opportunities to make those incremental improvements that would have you much closer to achieving your dreams.

8| Stop Giving Energy to the Wrong People

The people in your life that occupy your time combine to become who you are. If you surround yourself with negative, toxic, depressing people, you will find yourself being influenced by these mindsets. When you surround yourself with motivated, accomplished, optimistic people, that same influence will occur. Reflect carefully on the people in your life with whom you spend the most time and make some honest decisions about who is pulling you down and who is raising you up.

9| Stop Giving Energy to the Wrong Tasks

When trying to achieve your goals in life, it becomes essential that you place your own needs and priorities above those that others would place upon you. If something does not support your goals or is not in line with your values, say, “no.” When you turn down demands like these, you are really saying “yes” to yourself. You are getting rid of the limitations of expectation or guilt and instead are redefining the value of your time and energy to focus squarely on accomplishing your goals.

10| Never Stop Growing

It is unfortunate that many in our society think that all learning happens and school and, once done with that requirement, learning is over. Life is a journey full of learning experiences, and when you develop a growth mindset that understands and appreciates the importance of life-long learning, you can achieve anything to which you set your mind. Knowledge, skills, perspectives, and perceptions should evolve with each new experience in life.

Tips For Letting Go Of The Limitations And Achieving The Life You Want

The path in life is not always smooth, and if you are striving to achieve something new, it can be even more difficult. Once you are on the road to your new destination, you are likely to encounter obstacles, speed bumps, road closures, and possibly even complete bridge collapse, all of which will require mental habits and cognitive tools to help you determine a new route to success.

When you are finding it difficult to live the life you want, it is time to double down on yourself, dig deep for the strength needed, and find new solutions to the unique challenges ahead. Here are some tips on how to overcome life’s inevitable challenges and achieve the life you have always wanted. These are practical suggestions that can be applied to many difficult situations, and with each, you will hopefully find a small kernel of hope that you too can surpass your limits and achieve your dreams.

#1. Clear your mind

When life hands you lemons, you sometimes have to work harder to see the lemonade. Start with clearing your mind of all expectations, assumptions, and plans. Let go of all your preconceptions about worry about failure, and just stop for a bit. Observe what is around you, see your situation from new perspectives, and consider new pathways forward or around. Your point of view can help you change directions easily, so clear your mind of everything but the moment, and look for possibilities.

#2. Find balance

When times get tough, and you are fighting back hard, be sure to pace yourself. It is easy to let exhaustion be the reason you can’t move forward. Find a healthy balance between perseverance and survival, and do not let your determination get in the way of maintaining healthy habits that are good for your body and soul. This is not the time to stop taking care of yourself. 

#3. Find one small thing you can do today

When you are faced with an overwhelming challenge, and it looks impossible to solve, stop focusing on finding THE answer and instead find AN answer. Take one small baby step toward your goal and begin chipping away at the problem. Any forward progress is better than no forward progress, so do what you can do today, and let tomorrow take care of itself.

#4. Prove yourself wrong

When you feel defeated, you can trick yourself into moving forward by trying to prove yourself wrong. Sometimes, all it really takes is a belief that you can actually do something for it to happen. Expectations have a way of becoming reality. So, the moment your mind starts thinking you can’t make it, turn your sights on disproving yourself, and chances are high you will succeed. 

#5. Reconsider your goal

When you have been spinning your wheels for a long time, it may be necessary to reconsider your aim. For example, are you seeking a rewarding career, or are you just trying to be happy in your current job? If the latter is not working, maybe it is time to focus on how to make the former happen. We all want a successful, loving relationship with our partner, but if you have tried for too long and can’t make it work, perhaps your loving marriage is with someone different. It is sometimes necessary to shift your dreams for something that is attainable that will also bring your happiness in the future.

#6. Put yourself first

If you are sacrificing yourself more to help others attain their goals to the detriment of your own dreams, it may be time to reevaluate your priorities. Creating a life that is yours involves placing yourself and your dreams above those of others, which can be hard. 

While it is certainly okay to live your life to help others sometimes, it should not be where you direct the majority of your attention, if this is interfering with your happiness and goal attainment. Remember who is important and redirect your energies when needed.

#7. Ask for help

You may not always be able to figure out solutions on your own. Sometimes, you need help. It can come from partners, friends, colleagues, mentors, or even professionals, but get the guidance and advice you need to figure out the way ahead. Always ask for help from those you trust and who have your best interests at heart. 

#8. Have fun

And, when all else fails, and you are really stuck, relax and let go for a bit. All work and no play is not a healthy balance. Having fun and letting loose for a bit is often just what your mind needs to feel recharged and uplifted in times of stress, which can help you stay motivated to keep pushing forward later on. But life is not worth it if you can’t find the joy in each day. So, relax, have some fun, and return to fight your battle another day.

Begin Living A Life That’s Yours

Happiness is not something that happens to you, it is something you create, and it is an ongoing process throughout your life. If you want to be happy, then you have to start doing something. 

Any journey begins with a single step, so if you are ready to live the life that is yours, then pick the first step, and get going. Everything you do today will help you be that much closer to your next big goal, and only be putting in the work and making the necessary efforts can you create the life you want.

Start by becoming aware of your goals and acting each day as if you are the person you want to become. Every day is an opportunity to expand yourself and build your life into your dream, and the more you visualize this and embody this daily, the more quickly you will start to believe it is yours. Make each choice in your life focused on moving you in the right direction. Become conscious that this is what you are working toward and make better choices each chance you get.

Getting anywhere starts with action, so stop waiting for things to change or the time to be just right. The perfect time is now. If the opportunities are not there currently, build them, make them happen. 

Write down an action plan, making each smaller goal tangible and one step closer to your ultimate aim. If you start forward and realize those are not the right moves, make adjustments or start again, but keep working at it every day.

Make sure you are holding yourself accountable for following through on what is important to you. Accountability helps you break bad habits and push through negative thoughts. Share your goals with people who are important to you and use your accountability measures to keep yourself motivated and focused on accomplishing your tasks. This will also help you break away from procrastination, rationalizations, and excuses for your lack of progress.

Your personal growth will take work and sacrifice in many areas, including financially, emotionally, spiritually, and physically. With consistent, thoughtful work and dedication, you can make gradual change and progress toward what you wish to achieve.

Become obsessed with your personal growth and seek out new and creative ways to stretch your boundaries and learn something new. Engage regularly in reflection to consider what is working, what needs improvement, and if your plans and goals need adjustments. 

Become thirsty for learning and experiences and be mindful of the blessings you have that allow you to achieve your dreams.

You are in charge of your own happiness, and only you can control your actions and emotions. Even in times of turmoil and distress, you have choices you can make that will teach you about yourself and your inner strength and grit. Whenever things get tough and you question whether or not you can truly attain your dreams, remember there is always something to learn, an opportunity to grow into a better person.

All of our lives have a finite number of days. Living each one to its full potential is key to releasing the boundaries and living the life you have always wanted. Make the most of each day, live without any regrets for the opportunities you have tried to grab hold of, and stop wasting time and energy on worry, anxiety, anger, and regret. 

We each only get one real chance at this great adventure we call life, and the question you should be asking yourself each day when you wake up is, “What am I going to do today that means I am living the life I want to live?”

May you achieve your dreams and find many ways to live the life you that is yours. By letting go of the confines, restrictions, and limitations of life, you learn to live unbridled and unfettered in ways that mean you can be who you truly want to be.